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gothicca

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locked... [25 Nov 2005|01:36pm]
Locked


sadly, it's that time.

given that my time at work doesn't leave me with much spare time, and what little i do have i tend to beta other writers fiction and want to concentrate more on my own, i'm closing all my other journals. i just don't have the energy to try to keep up with everything, so i'm opening a new one where i can post my fiction and other assorted what-not.
Going Under

[09 Jul 2005|03:40pm]
"those that fail to learn from the mistakes of the past are doomed to forever repeat them."

repeat and re-live them i do, again and again.

haunted nightly by visions of alternate realities of things that might have been until the dream world shatters as i bolt awake, covered in sweat in a freezing room, uncertain if the shouted name was aloud or just in my head, the pounding someone at the door or just the sound of my heart...

once again haunted in dreams by senses that i can no longer experience... feelings that i've tried to get over...

the softness of skin on my fingers, the warmth of a body held close...the feeling of drowning as i lose myself in her eyes. why should i be dreaming of her again after so long of not?

one from so long ago, and two nights later, one from not so long ago...

i'm pushing myself too hard and being pulled in too many different directions so that i don't know if i'm coming or if i'm going anymore.

who are you and where am i? or is that where are you and who am i? fuck, i don't know anymore.

you won't cry for my absence, i know -
you forgot me long ago.
am i that unimportant...?
am i so insignificant...?
isn't something missing?
isn't someone missing me?

even though i'm the sacrifice,
you won't try for me, not now.
though i'd die to know you love me,
i'm all alone.
isn't someone missing me?


think only i'm missing myself.

it's typical - create a world
a special place of my design
to never cope...or never care
just use the key cause...

he's alone...
(and he has become...)
he's alone...
(and he has become...)

well, if they're making it (making it)
then they're pushing it (pushing it)
and they're leading us...along

the hassle of (hassle of)
all the screaming fits (screaming fits)
that panic makes...remorse!

over and over a slave...became
over and over a slave...became
over and over a slave...became
over and over a slave


perhaps soon i'l be able to find myself free once again.
Going Under

[25 Jun 2005|01:15pm]
yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sweet vindication!

getting a new job, even if it is technically a promotion. it's out of the damn heat, in an air-conditioned office, so that's the main important thing. oh yeah, i'll be working on the companies web-page, so that's something else that's a plus. (did i mention that i also get free lunch? in an air conditioned office? and get paid to play on a computer?)
Going Under

in the meantime - spacehog [22 May 2005|01:30pm]
while it's on my mind there's a girl that fits the crime... for a future love dream that i'm still to find... but in the meantime...Collapse )
4 Drowning with You | Going Under

private journal... [27 Oct 2004|08:46pm]

by: darklegend72 at legendary_icons
banner by night_fall from legendary_icons


You are Slackware Linux. You are the brightest among your peers, but are often mistaken as insane.  Your elegant solutions to problems often take a little longer, but require much less effort to complete.
Which OS are You?


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Going Under

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